Sick of Being Nice

OK, I know that title sounds like I believe I am the nicest person ever, what a big head I truly am. But that is not what I mean. I don't think that I am particularly nice in comparison to a lot of people. What I do hate though is when you have to nice even though something crappy is going on. I have a few examples of this.

When you are a restaurant and the server comes to take your plates, or in fact nowadays at an earlier stage, when the head server fellow comes round and asks if everything is OK, you have be nice and say everything is lovely. Especially if it isn't. Heaven forbid we offend the cocky git by expressing our true impressions of the meal. Apparently saying, "Aye, it's grand" isn't enough, when that is as positive a description as I can muster at the time. In fact, as people seem happy enough to tell me, that makes me a bastard.

In the work place, this required niceness goes in to over drive. I get that everyone has to get on at work, and every so often there will be stuff that happens that you don't like that you have to grin and bare, but apparently that rule doesn't apply to everyone. I'm sure you have all been in meetings (bloody meetings!!) where one person spends ages banging on about something, generally nothing to do with the aim of the meeting and often getting quite obnoxious about it. It takes all my power not to say anything at the time to shut him/her down, but afterwards when I speak to colleagues about how ridiculous he was, they just say, "Aww, that's just Kevin."  Well, Fuck Kevin. No one lets me away with being an eejit and explains it away by it just, "Being Dave." In fact, normally I would get dragged across the coals and given warning left right and centre, and yes, I would have to be nice about it and thank them for bringing it to my attention. Bet Kevin doesn't! (Please note, Kevin isn't a real person, I made him up. His real name was Eddie. Not it wasn't. Maybe it was. But it wasn't).

I also hate phone calls of bad news where you have to be nice. For example, that call to tell you you haven't been given the job you applied for, or that place on the sports team, or failed an exam, etc. In direct opposition what you wish you could say, you say the likes of, "Oh OK, well thank you anyway."  Inside you may wish to tell them where to go for over looking the greatness that is you. I know the reason most people are nice in these cases is so they don't cut off any opportunities in the future. Sound argument, though if I were making that call and the person at the other end said, "Oh fuck sake, I really wanted that. Jesus!!" At least then you know the person cared. Far better than the apathetic response that people normally give. Well, except Kevin of course.

As soon as I win the lottery (bound to happen, though may happen sooner if I start playing the lottery), I am going to go an a campaign of honesty. If service is shit, and someone asks how it is, I shall say it was shit. If the service is appalling in a shop, not only will I put my items down and not shop there again, I shall speak to the manager about how poor Stacy's service was. In fact, stuff it, I'm a millionaire, I shall buy the shop and my first action as owner would be to sack Stacy in no uncertain terms. And I'd do it free in the knowledge that I won't need a job from anyone again, unless I squander all my money away firing people. You have all been warned!